Daddy’s birthday was Monday, and I’ll never stop missing him. It brings me comfort knowing I was blessed to have him with me for 28 years of my life.

The love and acceptance we receive from our parents contribute significantly to the love and acceptance we are able to give to ourselves later in life. This isn’t to say self love can’t be learned, but it makes it much more difficult. Let me be clear: the love of God is the only love we will ever need, and it’s more than enough to sustain us. However, God’s perfect will is for His children to have an earthly mother and an earthly father who love and protect them and teach them the love of Christ.

My parents weren’t perfect; no one’s are, but I have never, and I mean never for a single moment doubted they loved me. In loving me and spending their time and resources on me, they were teaching me, from a very young age, I had value.

We live in a society where fathers—good, stable fathers, are becoming more and more scarce. The little girl who grew up without a father or had to compete for her father’s attention and affection, grows up and goes searching for a man to fill her void; she goes out looking for her father in other men. She will probably be highly competitive with other women, and may use manipulation (which is just a form of witchcraft) to keep a man. That rejection in her heart causes her to settle for way less than she deserves, and she ends up conceiving a child with a man just like her father. The cycle then starts all over again.

So how do we break the cycle? Ask God to fill your voids. Find your worth in Him before you even consider getting into a relationship and especially before having children. It’s inevitable that what’s inside of you will reproduce itself. Be selective in choosing a partner. Pray about someone as soon as you meet them. Ask God to give you wisdom and discernment. Marry before having sex—make a lifelong commitment to loving and supporting one another. Most importantly, raise your children to know the love of their Heavenly Father.