Sometimes God speaks to us, but we are so lost, so broken, it can be hard to hear Him. There was a point in my life I was lost. During this time, God gave me a dream.
“The Little Girl” 6/19/16 (an entry from my dream journal) I was supposed to be babysitting a little girl at my parents’ house. This little girl felt like a sister to me. Lately, I had been doing my own thing and not tending to her properly. I loved her but at the same time was selfishly indifferent. This wise yet innocent child motions for me to come sit down beside her as she lay sick in her bed.
It wasn’t until later, I realized that little girl in the dream was my soul. I had become disconnected from that little girl, and I was not giving her the attention and care she needed.
My questions for you today are these: How are you treating that little girl or little boy inside of you? Are you honoring them? Are you ignoring them? Who were you before the rejection, before the disappointment, before the pain or trauma? Who were you before life happened to you? Are you still that person?
One honors his or her inner child when they welcome and seek out experiences that bring them joy and excitement as well as wonder and curiosity. It’s no coincidence the times I was the most lost were also the times I was the least creative. As a little girl, I loved to make art; I loved to create; I even loved to write. As a young adult, my creativity came out in other ways, dysfunctional ways because I was not honoring that little artist inside me who was dying to express herself. I spent hours at my vanity piling on the makeup; I spent all my money on clothes; I even took scissors to my own hair.
Are you taking care of your health? Are you eating enough? Are you eating too much? Are you eating the right things? Taking care of the body is crucial to be able to fully care for the soul. When we spend our lives dieting or worse, in a perpetual state of dieting and rebounding from dieting, we are not honoring the soul! The inner child craves safety, stability, and yes, good food as well!
I’ve always adored animals. When I was a little girl, it absolutely broke my heart when I found out what lamb chops were and that my parents had been feeding them to me for years. Vegetarianism is not something I push on anyone else but is simply one of the ways I am able to honor that little girl who has such a big heart for animals.
Children are optimistic and are able to immerse themselves in the present moment. Everything is new in the eyes of a child. Are you jaded? Pessimistic? Do you carry the pains of yesterday with you today? Are you in a state of unforgiveness? We must learn to let go of the past to embrace the present moment, seeing it for what it is—a new beginning.
I’ll never forget the pain of one particular afternoon. I had just graduated nursing school, passed my boards, and I was days away from starting my first job as a nurse. Nothing was tangibly wrong, and that made it hurt even worse. I couldn’t figure out what it was that hurt so badly and why all I wanted was to go back to being a little girl. It became this obsessive, intrusive thought that I just could not shake; I wanted to go back. Looking back on that day now, I know exactly what that pain was and why I was experiencing it. I was not honoring my inner child, and my soul was crying out to me.
A few mornings ago, instead of picking up my Bible, I reached for “The Beginner’s Bible”—a Bible given to me by my brother when I was a little girl. I had never read that Bible. I started to a long time ago, but I never got very far.
As I sat and read, I remembered my dream and thanked God that little girl didn’t give up on me—didn’t give up on herself.